Trumpf Will Not Fuck a Chicken on Broadway as Rumored

Figuring out how these idiotic rumors get started, even as Trumpf expands the boundaries of idiocy, has become a science requiring persistence and patience.  After exercising some persistence and patience, I think I can write that this crazy rumor originated with the Fags for Trump, an ad hoc group similar to Blacks for Trump or Women for Trump, over countless cocktails at that notable watering hole on the Upper East Side and maybe at another in Greenwich Village.  It is true that Trumpf needs another big act to reinforce his support among his racist, obese, medicated, post-menopausal faithful, but to fiuck a chicken on Broadway, and on New Year's Eve to boot, poses enormous problems in logistics.  Imagine the concerns of the police department and fire department on the matter of crowd control, and security, et cera.  NO WAY, Trumpf, one just can't fuck chickens on Broadway to impress the lower white classes.  In New York, Ryan Seacrest packs more clout than the White House anyway.  Thankfully.  Anyhow, the critical issue involves the chicken and I'll have to leave it there.  So it does remain a mystery what stunt Trumpf will perform to close out this disastrous year, now that his chickenfuck antic is out of the question. So now, not to worry, there'll be Republican chicken fucking in New York on NYE.  We can't speak for anyplace else, however.

Young Evangelical Takes It in the Heart Instead of in the Ass

He was young.  He was Christian and Evangelical.  He was Virginal.  And he wanted to Get Laid in the most desperate way, I've concluded.  And religion was the outlet for acting out this desperation.  Superficially, he appeared feverish with Christian fervor and evangelism was an accessible means of acting out.  There are lots of misguided evangelicals out there as it's an easy club to join; in fact, it's a big business.  But for all the requirements of evangelical christianity meaning one has to get out there and Spread the Word, its members usually stick to friendly waters.  That was the Young Christian's big mistake, and getting there by canoe, no less.  Jesus wants his followers to obey the law, even if it's imposed by heathens like Hindoos.  Another mistake, young man. 

If only Christians lived their Bible.  For a young virgin to want sex and to engage in sex is not a sin as described in the Ten Commandments.  There's some twaddle about adultery, but an unmarried virgin cannot commit adultery, simply by definition.  Oh why couldn't your Christian colleagues have steered you in the right direction?  A nice hygienic dick might have something for you.  Instead you broke with Jesus' teaching, broke the law with the idea of selling religion to a primitive people not interested in your message and hostile to your mere presence.  And it what language were you intending to spread the Gospel to these unwilling prospects? 

Oh, poor young virginal Christians everywhere, please...please Get Laid!

Did Trump's Spray-On Tan Fail?

It's not something anyone I know might be interested in, but evidently there are some decent spray on tans out there.  French fashion house Guerlain puts out something called a terra cotta bronzer, which sounds fabulous.  Whatever Trumpf is using to make himself look like an underbaked chicken, it should be no surprise that it wasn't up to a Paris autumn rain.  So it went that Trumpf may have feared his tan running down his face, and that wouldn't do,so appearances were canceled.  What to do?  Trumpkins should pitch in and have a shitload of Guerlain terra cotta bronzer sent over to the White House right now, but that probably won't happen.  Last I checked: Guerlain is still French.

GOP Gives Linzie Graham More Time to Butch It Up

Billy admits that he didn't realize how fast Trumpf would act to send Ole Miss Sessions slammin' back to Alabam.  One goddamned day after the Dems sealed the deal (tho it's still not over, it's good enuf as-is), Trumpf appointed what appears to be a big bald white con man to run the show at the Justice Department.  What gives?  Why not appoint the Confirmed Bachelor straight out?

Rumors swirling within conservative fag Republican circles suggest that the Confirmed Bachelor required more time to become acceptably macho for the job.  The unisexual name doesn't help...would that be Miss or Mr.?  And Billy disagrees that Southern accents are uniformly faggy.  He attributes that idea to the most famous Southern fag of all time, the great Truman Capote, and Tru's drug and drinking problems only exaggerated such.  But the Confirmed Bachelor went off the rails during the Kavanaugh hearings, sounding more like a Carolina spinster ranting against integrating her little niece's kindergarten class.  It didn't read well at all.  It was scary.  Is there an old Confederate hag in there, screaming to get out?  Somebody, do something.

And Billy surmises that the GOP has given up on locating some baritone babe to commit to 'stunt babe' status with the idea of making the Bachelor less Confirmed. 'Stunt Babe' is a term I never encountered during my time in the military.  I read it in Rich Merritt's 'Secrets of a Gay Marine Porn Star'...(while still on active duty, Rich performed in gay porn under the name of Danny Orlis, pretty ballsy I have to say)..where gaylena officers teamed with muff munchin' counterparts for the appearance of respectability.  Basically, it was a gay sham to keep reality under wraps.  These were career military officer types with a lot to lose.  The Confirmed Bachelor himself served honorably and so evidently understands how this game must be played.  No dice, Billy guesses.  People are too smart these days.  Besides, if he wanted to play the game, he'd have a stunt babe of his own by now.

But the butching up campaign goes on.  Republican bitches are whispering that Sarah Huckabee Sanders might be called in to give the Confirmed Bachelor some coaching on how to project a tough mannish snarl and how to master the extenuated run-on word salad responses to tough questions.

With that that big bald white dude barrelling his big rig towards the obvious roadblock, Billy guesses that Fox News will be called in to build up the Confirmed Bachelor as acceptable as-is.

GOP too nelly to stop Trumpf now

Billy has felt all along that Trumpf was an accident and the GOP was too confused to do anything about it.  I'm writing about the GOP primary season with all those candidates, Trumpf among them, what's he doing here?  Is he for real?  No, it's not for real...but for him it was fun, all that attention, the adoring crowds, let's keep it going. let's keep it outrageous.  If there had been only one or two other imposing candidates, the GOP establishment might have done something to hinder the Trumpf climb, but with over a dozen candidates, each not sure which or whom to attack first, any resistance was dissipated, especially after the Great White Hope Jeb Bush turned out to be Merely White.

At the GOP convention, Billy kept waiting for the credentials committee to challenge Trumpf, after all he had been a New York Democrat, buddies with Bill & Hillary, a mover and shaker who had to work with city government officials, unions, charities, neighborhood groups...in New York...and got good at it...how could he not be a Democrat then?  Why is he a Republican now?  Because he showed that he could best harness hatred for Obama and the Clintons better than any other Republican at the time, Billy guesses.

Well, it's too late now.  Trumpf has clearly taken over the party and refashioned it in his own image,as the cliche goes.  He's had help, too: a Senate leader who looks suspiciously like an old Irish nun in a suit and tie.  It's obvious she'd support the Whore of Babylon if Trumpf nominated such for the Supreme Court. 

But when the butchest Republican in the Senate, that on-the-surface Very Nice Lady with the Connecticut lockjaw accent, announced that she would vote for a pasty-faced dough ball for the Supreme Court, it became clear that the Last Man had caved in.  One could say that at least Kavanaugh's better than the Whore of Babylon.  Could one?  Really?

When Trumpf was put into the White House...Billy suspected some vote tinkering, but not the Commie Russian variety...he predicted endless litigation of one kind or another, and that has turned out to be true.  Whatever happens next week, there will be even more litigation, and the whitey dough ball will be involved and not how you might think, and Trumpf will be laid bare, in more than one way, and we'll see how the Democrats measure up...Billy hopes this nelliness will come to an end, somehow.

Vote, men. 

Trumpf Shits Where He Eats

The greatest vaudeville act to come out of Park Avenue continued to delight his fan club with an outrageous performance at a NATO conference, then delivered his usual load of bullshit to an unappreciative audience in London; so seeking better ratings, takes the act to Russia where he is expected to bring down the house.  Expect a new act in Russia with its crypto-gayboi Himself a formidable Star in His Own Right who will roll out the Red Carpet for the Park Avenue vaudevillian, and a Private Lapdance Meeting (for all we know) away from that pesky media.  Yes, that's what it will be: a Private Lapdance with a crypto-gay.  You can fill out the blanks as you see fit. 

We anxiously await what comes out of the Private Session, but one thing is certain: the players will be toasting with Pinko Champagne. 

Trumpf, L'il Kim: Lorie Daves Beauty Failures

One would think the Lorie Daves' beauty treatment, peddled in jest by Saturday Night Live back in the day, would not have worked for either the Fake President or Korean playmate, L'il Kim.  Lorie's treatment is more of a strategy than a treatment, and it's pretty simple: hang out with hideous people who make you look gorgeous by comparison.  As we all observed, such a treatment didn't work well in Singapore at all: chubby L'il Kim stuck to his landscaped head and the usual flab-concealing suit tank he favors.  Fake President showed up in his usual bulky mass of dark fabric stiched together somewhere in Mexico (assuming he wears his own brand of suit) and another of those long ties better than halfway to his crotch.  The end result, based on Lorie Daves: a draw.

It wasn't a draw regarding politics, however. Score it as a big win for L'il Kim in getting the cancellation of our war games exercises with South Korea.  As a veteran, I understand the enormity of this irresponsible decision that will compromise American readiness in case of military engagement, in the first place, that's why we're there in dicey Korea, at great expense to the American taxpayer among other matter.  In the second place, the Fake President is putting American service personnel at a disadvantage.  Even a Fake President, as a graduate of a rich boy's pissy military academy (nice uniforms!) should understand such military basics.  No chance.  Good work, L'il Kim: forget Lorie Daves, and yeah, your hair IS better.

Fake President Fucks It Up in Canada

A fabulous, blowsy, frowzy, bleached blond blowhard went north and from there things went south.  The news is abuzz over the G7 Meeting fiasco, with the Fake President and his hatchet men attacking our best friend and ally in the world, Canada.  The media pretends to be puzzled over Trumpf's attacks on Justin Trudeau, why, why, why?  It's obvious to me, and maybe to others.  The out-of-shape, fast food guzzling, tweeting Fake President couldn't handle being anywhere close to the young, handsome, articulate Canadian with good hair (unbleached) and wow, wearing a suit that actually fits.  So a Fake President, with all those bulges concealed in a bulky Trump suit (banned from Macy's god bless them), just did what any Mean Girl would do.  Who's surprised?  Not me, that's for sure. 

The Fake President might do better in his upcoming meeting in Singapore.  There won't be any Trudeaus there, but rather a schlumpy Asian chubette with a lot of obvious personal problems.  One thing, though, the Korean has better hair.  That might be enough to set the Fake President off.  We'll know soon enough.

Barebacking Hollywood Street Whore Runs for WeHo City Council

His real name is Erik Schmidt but I became aware of him when he was Erik Eriksen showing it off on the wrapper cover of the Knightbreeders (based in North Hollywood) video, 'Barebacking Hollywood Street Whores.'  And it is very nice, straight up and rock hard.  Erik wears nothing more than a fishnet top...and a baseball cap; nothing subtle about Knightbreeders porn. 

There was always a bit of humor to Erik's porn persona.  For a while he uploaded his own videos frequently on Xtube.  Mostly the videos followed Erik on his prowls around West Hollywood and meet ups starting at a garbage dumpster in the alley, for example.  He also had an interesting schtick: uploading hardcore sex videos with Erik delivering an exposition in front of the venue of the moment, a collection of some of the most notorious sheet burners to be found in LA, one of them, the Olive Motel on Sunset Blvd, I know personally.  If you like your sex sleazy this was the place to start.  Erik thought up this routine and it became a personal Xtube favorite, and I would have added them to my 'Favorites' collection, except for one thing: they were all safe sex videos, such was his sex life at the time.  So he can preach hiv prevention and not be phony about it, that's a fact.  Erik has admitted his own positive status and says it began with a rape...OK.

It's been a longtime since I lived in WeHo.  I grew up there before it incorporated into its own city, and when terms such as 'Boystown' and 'Swish Alps' were commonly used.  And though I live in San Francisco now, I remain interested in WeHo (a relatively recent term) and return a couple of times a year.  Give me a good reason and I'll get my ass down there.  From what I can see, the WeHo city government shows a bit of a good old gay boy culture, and I don't know how good that can be, but I'm pretty sure that Erik Schmidt is not part of it, and that's something.  He's educated, and a veteran, and that' a good thread for a start.  Barebacking.  Street Whore.  Poz.  Hung.  The thread goes on.  I wish I could endorse, but I can't here....I'm not qualified...but I think Erik Schmidt is a good start if you're not into good old gay boys.

Bye Bye BBRT

Nervous Craigslist gets out of the Personal Ad business.  That clunky legislation signed by Trumpf put the fear of Gawd in them and others, and them others would include BarebackRT, and this I've learned firsthand.  Now I'm pretty sure that my favorite hookup site doesn't have a hoard of trolls spying on its members the way supertech entities do.  I'm guessing they have a software that's flagging accounts based on language, terms, etc.  I think I may have mentioned 'escorts'...not a stretch...then I get my account, which I've hard from BBRT's earliest year...ah, 'terminated.'  Their term.  Yeah, I've used this website to hook up, meet people, and wow, make friends, who will last longer than BarebackRT ever will. 

This could be a sign of changing times...when website 'escorts' are now 'pornstars' or 'masseurs.'  A boring game, and just as boring as getting drunk at a bar while trying to hook up.  We'll have to see where this goes, but I do take comfort that I'm not the only one.  That great megaslut, Ryan Cummings himself, revealed on Twitter that he, too, has had his BBRT account 'terminated.'  But the sad thing: Ryan, I and thousands of others with terminated BBRT accounts, will discover that we don't need BBRT.  Maybe most of us never did.

Pissy Trumpf

The piss story was provocative, and not handled properly.  By 'properly' I mean that interesting questions were not asked, possibly because the media didn't want to appear 'too interested' in piss.  To be interested in the world of piss and to be interested in the people actually paid to pee, well...that's something most people are not ready to admit.

First of all, I believe that Trumpf was indeed offered professional sex while in Russia; Russians are known for their hospitality, and it's been reported that the girls might be Ukrainian, not Russian, and these girls are known for their beauty.  No wonder Putin wanted to annex part of the Ukraine, their women are renowned as fine specimens of the female species.  But, we are also writing about professional sex workers and no such girl would pee on a bed.  A professional leaves the room as she found it, as if she hadn't been there at all.  The conclusion is that Trumpf thought they were going to wet his bed.  The further conclusion is that he's pretty square when it comes to certain fetishes, even one as tame as pee.

Sadly, Trumpf's military academy training failed him when it could have helped him enjoy some fine Ukrainian kinky (well, OK, in some quarters, kinky) sex.  Trumpf did you forget what you learned in survival training?  If you have to, you...can...drink...your own piss.  It's clean, ya big germophobe.  Piss is sterile and about the tamest way to get another man's DNA deep into your gut.  Yes, you can drink Bronkowski's piss.  Yes, you can drink Sanchez' piss.  Yes, Trumpf, you can drink Washington's piss.  Trumpf!  Enjoy!  Your time in the presidential limelight is drawing short.

Porn World Awaits Spermy Daniels

Yeah, Stormy will bring down the Big Ugly White Man.  Actually Whitey isn't the type to let Himself get impeached.  He'll skip first, but we'll have to see how this plays out.  Any which way, it ain't gonna be pretty.  In the meantime, I'm ready for Spermy Daniels, the next great gay pornstar.  We already have Stormy, but she ain't gay.  And we have Christopher Daniels, and yes he's very nice.  But I'm ready for Spermy.  Which studio is going to bring him out?  'Til then, I'll be happy with the new talent out there, just in time to restore my faith in porn.  It was getting a little too respectable.  Now we're ready.

Fire Island Fuck Boy Breaks New Ground

It has long been a fantasy of mine to observe a celebrity, well-known or with a cause for being known...get down and dirty into bareback, getting fucked...and in a very big way.  I'm not into cable, but I've run into, despite steering away from..reality shows...straight or gay; so my knowledge of 'Fire Island' is based on the trailers and snippets found on YouTube.  You know the format already...let's stir up some conflict and capture the sparks flying, or the shit flying, and Patrick McDonald, the Southern gaylena transplant from LA & NYC (Brooklyn) is the spark that set the fire on Fire Island.

Well, he's that celebrity, reasonably well-known I suppose, certainly down and dirty, and most certainly, into bareback in a video by the smart guys at Raw Fuck Club, 'Fire Island Fuck Boy,' which came out last November and was for me the most notable event in Bareback Porn of 2017.  I don't care much for Patrick's nom de porn, Ace Arborwood, and I'm guessing it has something to do with his Georgia boyhood, but his performance is great.  If you find you're agreeing most of the time with my take on bareback porn, you'll like 'Fire Island Fuck Boy' Part 2, where the action moves to the sling and the loads start shootin' and Ace/Patrick does everything that a trashy white bottom slut is supposed to do, and with some nasty relish, demonstrating some natural talent.  RFC has rounded up a stable of hardy studs, some of whom you'll recognize, so enjoy FIFB.  The buzz online is that Patrick has 'disappeared,' so gay chatter is all about 'where is he?'  He created a Twitter account about the same time his video came out, but he hasn't posted once.  I don't think a porn career would hurt him at all, and hope to see more of him.  But he should be doin' somethin' right now, as the shelf life on pornstars is notoriously short, something we all recognize.

I don't know, of course, because I haven't met Patrick, but he's probably Negative and on Prep, which is typical for the emerging generation of bottom bitches...and since he's got nice hands, he's probably got nice feet which we're not permitted to see, as he wears some dorky hiking boots throughout.  I've gotta say that as far as my own fantasy of celebrity bottom pornstar goes, I'll have to settle on an Ace Arborwood.  And keep dreaming of Charlie Sheen.

Guns Is All About Sex

Hello Men, the Big Gun March is still a couple of weeks away, and it will be a game changer, but the discussion won't be enlightened much, and such is because we Amurricans keep dancing around the real issue: the NRA and its gazillions of guns is All About Sex.  Take away the guns from these girleens and you've basically cut their balls off.  And their diminishing weenies are all these menopausal toads have got goin' for themselves.  The March is only one part of these Changing Times we're living through (very exciting, actually, if you're on the right side of the fence), namely, the eclipse of White Male Entitlement.

A new truck used to be enough for 'em; but then trucks got girly, with little mirrors to check your make-up before you swaggered into the bar in the middle of nowhere redstate land.  Now it's a gun, and they gotta have not just one, but a whole garage full of guns...each time they look downwards and take note of how much Peter has shrunk, they gotta go out and buy another gun.  The first gun used to be a sort of rite of passage.  The rite of passage is a familiar theme in American teen literature.  It could have been illustrated by a horse, or a football, or a surfboard.  Boy grows up.  Boy Gets His First Gun.  And then another, and maybe yet another.  Some of these White Men are out of control. 

Full disclosure: I used to be a junior member of the NRA, albeit years ago.  But as we fired our .22's (single bolt action, dating myself, yipes!), we juniors knew it was all about gun safety and respect for the weapon.  That shit was hammered into us, and I learned it for a lifetime: treat every gun as if it were loaded, don't point it at anybody, etc.  It all sounds quaint now, because today Guns Is All About Sex, and while usually still more expensive than a hooker, but not necessarily.

There was a time when the NRA looked for the butchest, most self-assured type to serve as Spokesman for Guns.  Charlton Heston played it fairly well, if sometimes going over the top...'my cold dead hands'...pretty good Chuck, not bad for a dude who Gore Vidal alluded was too dumb to be gay.  But that was the gig, and I think a professional one, as Mr. Heston used to be a fairly liberal activist and Democrat, before the Guns.  At present, the NRA leadership looks so squirrelly as to make one wonder if the endowment matches to the proto-rodent exterior. 

Mark my words: the Gun Battle will intensify, and get butt-ugly, but in the long term, the right girls will win this battle. They've got no dick no lose.

Trumpkin Commie Stooges for a New Century

It used to be 'commie pinko fag.'  Which was worse?  To be a commie, Communist...as in Lenin, Stalin, Putin, for you youngins, or a 'fag?'  Well, it was a match, the terms went hand in hand, the worst!  A commie AND a fag...the lowest form of humanity.

There were (and are, apparently, according to current news accounts)...spies...or...commie 'sympathizers,' or stooges, what was called, back in the day, a commie tool.  Liberals could be dismissed as 'parlor pink' or 'wearing red pajamas.'  That would have been your Aunt Ida, and she was a Democrat of  course.

In the Bush era, the spies or commie tools were usually in financial distress...debts, outstanding monetary obligations were seen as the motives for spilling military and political secrets.  These guys were usually well-educated and did their damage from the inside.  A military profile was often the norm.  A woman was often involved.  No gays in this mess, however.  This environment seems to be absent in the current unfolding of events.  Today's stooges don't seem to have traveled this path, but the jury is still out.

Anyway, the media of an earlier time would not have pursued any gay angle even if there had been one, I think.  In the 1950's Alger Hiss case (leveraged to the max by primo Commie hater Richard Nixon), it was much later that a possible gay issue was revealed.  The obese, disheveled, schlumpy 'reformed' gaylena Whittaker Chambers went after Hiss after only after Chambers' alleged gay moves were rejected.  In retrospect, the Hiss case, could have been the ideal setting for 'commie pinko fags.'
But such was not to be.

British intelligence was thick with educated, posh gays passing secrets to Stalinist Russia during the 1950's, and there was a gay mafia within, some of whom ended up in Russia and part of the terms offered involved the Russians providing Soviet boyfriends.  Sounds pretty faggy.  The subject requires more study on my part, but 'commie pinko fag' certainly seems to be part of the mix here, a form of British social and sexual disaffection, homosexuality at its heart.

Today's stooges may be motivated by greed, but the narrative is still being played out.  Real estate deals seem to be the bottom line with unsavory Russians anxious to convert their useless rubles into American dollars through real estate investments.  And there are stooges willing to help them, for whatever reason, we will see.  But we do have Russian commies in the White House Oval Office.  We do see GOP and Russian chumminess that must be rockin' old Richard Nixon in his Republican grave.  We have yet to understand the level of commie and stooge cooperation in the technological tinkering with the American electoral process.  Commie, yeah.  Pinko, oh yeah.  Fag, still missing...but this trail has far to go.