Tuesday, March 6, 2018

Guns Is All About Sex

Hello Men, the Big Gun March is still a couple of weeks away, and it will be a game changer, but the discussion won't be enlightened much, and such is because we Amurricans keep dancing around the real issue: the NRA and its gazillions of guns is All About Sex.  Take away the guns from these girleens and you've basically cut their balls off.  And their diminishing weenies are all these menopausal toads have got goin' for themselves.  The March is only one part of these Changing Times we're living through (very exciting, actually, if you're on the right side of the fence), namely, the eclipse of White Male Entitlement.

A new truck used to be enough for 'em; but then trucks got girly, with little mirrors to check your make-up before you swaggered into the bar in the middle of nowhere redstate land.  Now it's a gun, and they gotta have not just one, but a whole garage full of guns...each time they look downwards and take note of how much Peter has shrunk, they gotta go out and buy another gun.  The first gun used to be a sort of rite of passage.  The rite of passage is a familiar theme in American teen literature.  It could have been illustrated by a horse, or a football, or a surfboard.  Boy grows up.  Boy Gets His First Gun.  And then another, and maybe yet another.  Some of these White Men are out of control. 

Full disclosure: I used to be a junior member of the NRA, albeit years ago.  But as we fired our .22's (single bolt action, dating myself, yipes!), we juniors knew it was all about gun safety and respect for the weapon.  That shit was hammered into us, and I learned it for a lifetime: treat every gun as if it were loaded, don't point it at anybody, etc.  It all sounds quaint now, because today Guns Is All About Sex, and while usually still more expensive than a hooker, but not necessarily.

There was a time when the NRA looked for the butchest, most self-assured type to serve as Spokesman for Guns.  Charlton Heston played it fairly well, if sometimes going over the top...'my cold dead hands'...pretty good Chuck, not bad for a dude who Gore Vidal alluded was too dumb to be gay.  But that was the gig, and I think a professional one, as Mr. Heston used to be a fairly liberal activist and Democrat, before the Guns.  At present, the NRA leadership looks so squirrelly as to make one wonder if the endowment matches to the proto-rodent exterior. 

Mark my words: the Gun Battle will intensify, and get butt-ugly, but in the long term, the right girls will win this battle. They've got no dick no lose.