Friday, May 24, 2019

Southern GOP Advances Minorities as Majority Trajectory

White racists that they are, one would think they'd be moving to force abortions among women of color.  You would think they'd be moving to castrate black males.  But they're not doing that.  Quite the opposite. 

Growing up in California, I wish I had paid more attention when this racist angle was playing out at home.  My experience would go back 25, 30 years ago.  There were plenty of white racists in California at the time, and they all agreed that too many Mexicans were 'ruining' their idea of California.  They elected a Republican governor who did a fine job of alienating Mexican-Americans, a pose that will be remembered for a long time.  Not too smart, as the Latino community was already growing much, much faster than the Anglos were.  It was simply a matter of demographics and...basic math.  And the Republicans weren't even counting Asians.  Subsequent Republican governors didn't do an adequate job of reaching out to minorities, and a trajectory was in place.

The Bible Belt still sees the GOP as the white man's party.  What they can't admit is that the GOP is sealing their doom, and it's pretty clear that these Red States will conform to the California model, even though it will take another 25 years; that road is under construction.  Thanks, Republicans...what's disappointing is that the trail getting there can be pretty ugly, and that's what we're going through now.

The California racists moved to Idaho, Utah and Wyoming, in their efforts to get away from all those 'dang Messicans.'  Dem Messicans (and Latinos in general, and Asians (!)) will follow them there.  As for all those fine Red Staters who are not racists, they'll be moving on to greater opportunities in Arizona, Nevada, Florida, California...places full of Mexicans and other Latinos.  This is getting to be a boring story, certainly enough for me.

Saturday, May 11, 2019

Trump's Big Bear Disgraces Bears Everywhere

He's in contempt of Congress but still out there, a free bear roaming about, albeit a bit more elusive than usual.  Everybody in the gay community loves our Bears.  These gentle giants are loved for their generous and kind natures, with the best of them rather jolly and fun-loving.  Most Bears are simply friendly and outgoing and without a shred of pretension.  Your best friend...think about it...is probably a nice, big Bear.  He'd probably lend you five bucks if you had to ask and if he had it to lend.  Big William Barr, the most high profile Bear in the Nation behaved disgracefully before Congress last week and let's leave it at that.  All the Bears I know are decent human beings.  Nothing like this big, bloated creature, who might be just steps away from jail time.  We'll have to be patient and wait to see how long this takes.  But one thing we now know for sure:  this bear does not shit in the woods...this bear shits where he eats.  Let's not let him speak for all the Great Bears out there.

Monday, April 29, 2019

Hamster Fends Off Gator at NRA Convention

An in-house feud over money and possible other issues came to the surface during the National Rifle Association's meeting last week.  With all those Mean Girls packing heat, it should come as no surprise that feuds would arise, badass sorority girls with guns being what they are.  But who would have thought that the rabbit-faced, rodent-like Wayne de la Pierre (sic) would have ousted ex-Colonel Ollie (Gator) North in this colorful battle?  To my mind, it ended all too early, with the Ollie-Gator slithering back into The Swamp.  With a sniveling, sniffin hamster sending the gap-toothed fierceness of Ollie Gator into the darkness of the ooze, the continued decline of the Gals With Trucks and Guns, our NRA seems destined to feebleness, echoing the lapse of the American Legion, the Boy Scouts and other forms of formula masculinity.  Time moves on whether this Old School America likes it or not.

Sunday, January 6, 2019

San Francisco Gay Landmarks Pass with 2018

The Nob Hill Theater is no more.  The nice guys, who owned and operated it, retired and sold the building and went south to spend their golden years in the desert.  In its closing days, the place was open to the public and everything, that wasn't nailed down, was offered up for sale.  While I detected a number of curiosity seekers, the bulk of the crowd consisted of men who ventured there with a purpose: to review, remember and touch the final curtain.  There was no curtain at the Nob Hill, actually, and the theater is much smaller than I had remembered.  Probably only about 50 could be seated at any given time and the stage was intimate and reachable, so important to its ends.

So many years have passed since I was last a paying customer there, that the mirror cracks with this confession: I paid money I had struggled to earn, to watch the legendary Chris Burns perform his dildo routine on that very stage.  As I revisited last month, that whole era came back, and in a very bittersweet way, as Chris (or Danny, straight out of Vallejo) was very much a local San Francisco character, seen bopping around town on his motorcycle, a regular at the Eagle usually in jeans and a ripped tee shirt slit down to his waist (decades before these latter queens), having ventured out from his digs in the faded lavender Victorian next to Stomper Boots.  Chris worked for San Francisco's Falcon Studios and Bijou Studios, and did some down and dirty work for LeSalon, but I liked him best in 'Room Service Plus' (by Sid Roth), filmed on location at the fabled Coral Sands motel down in LA.  I think I may still have that video somewhere, in its VHS format, but I've never seen his donkey fuck video, rumored for so long that it is part of the local folklore for those of us who have survived to this day that the Nob Hill is no more.

I never ventured to the back room, designed for more intimate entertainment, but that had nothing to do with the Nob Hill management.  I don't like sex with my clothes on, so the back room never interested me.  And don't ask about the 442 Natoma, although I'm glad for its presence and am a little anxious that it might not survive this year.  I admit to being sentimental, but I don't understand why it's not a consistent thing with me.  For example, on more than one occasion, I had the chance to see Armond Rizzo at the Nob Hill, but I just couldn't get it together...and I like Armond as much as I like Chris Burns.  Anyway, all the inventory at the Nob Hill theater boutique was for sale, as were the furnishings in the 'Green Room' apartment in the back (was there a nice little deck out there or am I just wishing?), and a lot of props, including the stuff used by Rafael Alencar, who was the last of a long list of great acts who made the Nob Hill so special.  I did buy a little concrete planter box, which has nothing to do with porn.  Like I said, I am sentimental in some ways.

Another gay San Francisco landmark that didn't make it to 2019 is the famous Gump's department store.  I go back to the older store just off Union Square where the clerks wrote the sales in long hand and took it to the cashier personally, and brought back your receipt or change with your purchase carefully wrapped.  There was never a rush at Gump's (except at the After Christmas sale) and people in a hurry wouldn't bother with Gump's.  It was so, so, nice. While the ground floor housed jewelry, couture and a lot of high class decorator junk, there was the furniture and interior design department on the second floor, where the boys, clad in suits, sat at their desks and carried out business in a nice, low key style.  I guess it was too low key for the corporate people who bought the store from the Gump family, because the interior design department didn't make it to the newer, glitzier location.  Anyway, it's all gone now, and sadly missed.  So long, 2018.

Monday, December 24, 2018

Trumpf Will Not Fuck a Chicken on Broadway as Rumored

Figuring out how these idiotic rumors get started, even as Trumpf expands the boundaries of idiocy, has become a science requiring persistence and patience.  After exercising some persistence and patience, I think I can write that this crazy rumor originated with the Fags for Trump, an ad hoc group similar to Blacks for Trump or Women for Trump, over countless cocktails at that notable watering hole on the Upper East Side and maybe at another in Greenwich Village.  It is true that Trumpf needs another big act to reinforce his support among his racist, obese, medicated, post-menopausal faithful, but to fiuck a chicken on Broadway, and on New Year's Eve to boot, poses enormous problems in logistics.  Imagine the concerns of the police department and fire department on the matter of crowd control, and security, et cera.  NO WAY, Trumpf, one just can't fuck chickens on Broadway to impress the lower white classes.  In New York, Ryan Seacrest packs more clout than the White House anyway.  Thankfully.  Anyhow, the critical issue involves the chicken and I'll have to leave it there.  So it does remain a mystery what stunt Trumpf will perform to close out this disastrous year, now that his chickenfuck antic is out of the question. So now, not to worry, there'll be Republican chicken fucking in New York on NYE.  We can't speak for anyplace else, however.

Friday, November 30, 2018

Young Evangelical Takes It in the Heart Instead of in the Ass

He was young.  He was Christian and Evangelical.  He was Virginal.  And he wanted to Get Laid in the most desperate way, I've concluded.  And religion was the outlet for acting out this desperation.  Superficially, he appeared feverish with Christian fervor and evangelism was an accessible means of acting out.  There are lots of misguided evangelicals out there as it's an easy club to join; in fact, it's a big business.  But for all the requirements of evangelical christianity meaning one has to get out there and Spread the Word, its members usually stick to friendly waters.  That was the Young Christian's big mistake, and getting there by canoe, no less.  Jesus wants his followers to obey the law, even if it's imposed by heathens like Hindoos.  Another mistake, young man. 

If only Christians lived their Bible.  For a young virgin to want sex and to engage in sex is not a sin as described in the Ten Commandments.  There's some twaddle about adultery, but an unmarried virgin cannot commit adultery, simply by definition.  Oh why couldn't your Christian colleagues have steered you in the right direction?  A nice hygienic dick might have something for you.  Instead you broke with Jesus' teaching, broke the law with the idea of selling religion to a primitive people not interested in your message and hostile to your mere presence.  And it what language were you intending to spread the Gospel to these unwilling prospects? 

Oh, poor young virginal Christians everywhere, please...please Get Laid!

Monday, November 12, 2018

Did Trump's Spray-On Tan Fail?

It's not something anyone I know might be interested in, but evidently there are some decent spray on tans out there.  French fashion house Guerlain puts out something called a terra cotta bronzer, which sounds fabulous.  Whatever Trumpf is using to make himself look like an underbaked chicken, it should be no surprise that it wasn't up to a Paris autumn rain.  So it went that Trumpf may have feared his tan running down his face, and that wouldn't do,so appearances were canceled.  What to do?  Trumpkins should pitch in and have a shitload of Guerlain terra cotta bronzer sent over to the White House right now, but that probably won't happen.  Last I checked: Guerlain is still French.